The Boston Market Story

The cradle of rotisserie chicken

(This story is embargoed until Charles "Ken" Zisa stops claiming to have dropped acid with  Jack "Ken" Kesey

2002 The Washingmachine Post

   Archaeologists have unearthed the remains of a large ancient settlement in what is now northwestern New Jersey that challenges conventional ideas about how civilization developed.

   Before the new discovery, the oldest cities were found in what is now southern Iraqensack, a region known as the "cradle of rotisserie chicken" because the first city-states were believed to have sprung up there about 6,000 years ago in the parking lot of the Mesopotamia Market.

   The newly discovered urban settlement, found at a site known as Tell Hamoukar But Don't Tell Jay, dates to about the same time period, indicating that cities might have emerged simultaneously in different areas.  The site has a large wall and other indications of a complex government, including huge ovens capable of cooking thousands of rotisserie chickens and numerous coupons offering a free rotisserie asp with every Cleopatra carver combo.

   "We need to reconsider our ideas about the beginnings of civilization, pushing the time further back," said Edwin P. Reiter of Fairleigh Dickinson University's Institute of Oriental Cuisine, who described the new findings at the International Conference on the Archaeology and Numismatology of South Iraqensack.

AP-NY-05-00  0957EDT