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The Boston Market Story


Boston Market Story publishes second first annual Swimsuit Issue

swimsuit issue


Special From "Eye on the Boston Market Story"

    MALI AFORETHOUGHT, Indonesia -- Sports Illustrated recalled 32 million newsstand copies of its annual Swimsuit Issue and hired hundreds of retired football players to tackle postal workers making their rounds and retrieve subscription copies so that it could replace the cover photo of a scantily clad Kate "Renata" Upton with a picture of Jeremy "Ken" Lin.

    In an ironic twist of coincidental fate, the Boston Market Story opted to go ahead with its second first annual Swimsuit Issue. Asked what happened to the first first annual Swimsuit Issue, world renowned numismatologist, headline writer par excelligente and Boston Market Story assistant publisher Edwin P. "Ken" Reiter explained that due to the declining publishing industry, the first first annual Swimsuit Issue had to be downsized.

  swimsuit issue The cover of the first first annual Boston Market Story Swimsuit Issue

    Unfortunately, the first first annual Swimsuit Issue had to be recalled as well due to an unfortunate incident while filming the young model pictured above ...


    After receiving an advance copy of the second first annual Boston Market Story Swimsuit Issue, Sports Illustrated publisher Steven "Ken" Baloney-Sandwich, whose father, Mack "Ken" Sandwich is a direct descendent of the Earl of Kent, you were expecting maybe the Earl of Sandwich? They may be cousins or something. At any rate, Baloney-Sandwich threatened to put the Boston Market Story on the cover of SI's first annual Lawsuit Issue.

    Meanwhile, a hungry public desperate for pictures of women in bikinis was causing  copies of the Boston Market Story's second first annual swimsuit issue to fly off the shelf, and already pirated copies of the back cover photo of notsosuperdupermodel Jenny "Renata" Whosyourmama have been selling on eBay for thousands of dollars.


Jenny "Renata" Whosyourmama


Chickie says: What was Whitney Houston's favorite drink?*








*She always loved Yoo-Hoo

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